Dad Jokes Rock

[Trappernicus]

Great place to post Dad Jokes 🦊

Question: How many surrealists does it take to change a lightbulb?

Answer: Jellybean.

Question: Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill?

Answer: To get to the bottom.

Question: What goes 99 clunk, 99 clunk, 99 clunk?

Answer: A centipede with a wooden leg.

[Trappernicus]

Question: How do you make a Kleenex dance?
Answer: Put a little boogie in it!

Question: How do you find a missing train?
Answer: Follow the tracks.

Question: How does a penguin build its house?
Answer: Igloos it together.

Question: What's black and white and red all over?
Answer: A sunburnt penguin.

Question: Why was the mushroom invited to all the parties?
Answer: Because he was a fungi.

Question: Why can't a bicycle stand on it's own?
Answer: It's two tired.

Question: Why does Dracula have no friends?
Answer: Because he's a real pain in the neck.

Question: How did the man give away batteries?
Answer: Free of charge.

[Trappernicus]

Halloween Special

Question: How do you escape being locked in a cemetery at midnight?

Answer: With a skeleton key.

Question: What are skeletons never upset?

Answer: Nothing gets under their skin.

Question: where do ghosts, zombies and monsters go to get made up?

Answer: To a boo-tician.

Question: Why are ghosts such terrible lyres?

Answer: Because they’re so transparent.

Question: Why do zombies hate going to parties?

Answer: People keep using them as dip.

Question: Why did the skeleton not go to the party?

Answer: He had no body to go with.

Question: What do cannibals like to do at parties?

Answer: Chase the zombies with crackers.

Question: Who did the ghost take to the party?

Answer: His ghoul-friend.

Question: What was the all time favourite dance of the party?

Answer: The monster mash.

Question: What did the zombie, vampire, skeleton and ghost drive to the party in?

Answer: A monster truck.

Question: Why do vampires have so few friends?

Answer: Because they’re pains in the neck.

Question: Why did the vampire become a vegetarian?

Answer: He said that steaks gave him heartburn.

Question: Why are dead people such great spies?

Answer: They’re good at working underground.

Question: What did the bar tender say when a vampire, zombie and skeleton walked in to the bar?

Answer: Why don’t you try using the door.

[Jack]

Not a dad joke but...

"Is your name Tera? Because, you look like a byte."
I used it on my bf the other day. I couldn't tell if he was humored or disappointed. LMFAO.

[Trappernicus]

Knock knock!

Whose there?

Doctor!

Doctor Who

Hey you know me!

[Trappernicus]

Q: What do you call a dog with no legs?

A: Doesn’t matter, it won’t come to you.

Q: What do you get when you cross a sheep with a rabbit?

A: A Wooly Jumper